Finally! The Solution to Middle East Conflict.

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The say the problems in the Middle East are unsolvable. The solution, however, is simple.

The thing that makes men happiest is looking at women. God designed it that way. It’s how the human race has perpetuated itself this long despite a whole lot of violence and misery. 

However, most women in the Middle East are covered from head to toe. The lucky ones are allowed to show their faces but many can’t even do that. They’re forced to walk around in 120 degree heat wearing black curtains called abaya’s. This makes the women miserable, which is never a good thing. As western men know, a happy wife makes a happy life.

Covering up the wonderment that is women also makes Muslim men miserable because they are depriving themselves of their greatest joy – the aforementioned ogling. Those poor slobs.

So the solution, it seems to me, is to get rid of the hijab’s and abaya’s and chador’s and jilbab’s and niqab’s and burqa’s and shalwar kameez’s. When they’re all gone and Muslim women are allowed to run around in daisy duke’s and bikini tops, they’ll be happier (and cooler), men will be MUCH happier, and even radical Muslims will be too busy being hypnotized by T&A to make bombs.

Turn those burqa’s into burqini’s! End of theory.

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